Dread book
by how-to-save-a-life8
Summary: The red book and its handler fell out of the map. The Winter Soldier is on the run and he will do anything to make sure no one else uses it to turn him into a killer again.
1. The Stunt Double

A/N: WOW! Writing this fic feels like getting to a party so late the birthday boy has already left, they are taking the decorations out and there's only one sad piece of cake left. Well I'll be damned if I'm not having that cake! All jokes aside, I really do love Bucky and all the time in the world with him wouldn't be enough, so, here is my take in on a little romance between the Winter Soldier and an O/C after the events of CAWS. This story is pretty much written so the posts should come really fast. I hope you enjoy!

Nina felt the bruises piling up in her hand from hitting at the punching dummy probably all day, speeding thru every series of strikes she knew. 'right, left, leg' she mouthed along with the movement, hurting hands were something she would deal with tomorrow.

"Nina, for fuck's sake! Leave the damn punching bag alone or I'll make you pay for a new one!" Her old sansei shouted making the girl fold over in laughter. The profanities were so very uncharacteristic for Mr. Caleb MacKenna but they came out of the fatherly love he felt for the girl or at least half of it did. The other half came from how much she stressed him constantly getting herself in trouble since she was a teenager.

"It's a dummy, Mac. I told you that." She said happilly pulling her long black hair in high bum. "I got this one for you remember?"

"I remember, you brought this in after you destroyed my punching bag." He frowned and walked closer to her. "Go home Nina. You've been sleeping in my office for three days. You're training, teaching classes and cleaning up just to start it all over again. I'm starting to worry about you, kid, again." He said in softest voice. His girl was falling into old habits acting just like she used to when he took her in, a 16 years old girl with nothing but a sad story and some strong sense of self destruction.

"I'm fine, really, I just want to be ready. I have this job in Los Angeles in a few days... In a high budget movie, I… I just want everything to go perfect." She mumbled.

"I'm sure you will be great. Gavin a called said he found you something, another lost and found thing." Mac said walking back to his office. "Watch yourself Nina, I don't trust this guy."

"Sansei!" Nina shouted and took a bow that undid her bum, Mac bowed and left her alone. Nina ran to get her bag in the dojo's locker room. Eight missing calls from Gavin he had to be excited about something.

Gavin was Nina's best friend, one of the first she made when she got to California. He was a talkative, easy-going redhead that always had an idea that 'would change their lives'. To his credit, not all of then turned out bad it was the case of their 'lost and found thing', he called it. What it was, really, his way of take advantage of one of Nina's unusual talents -which is something he did a lot- of locating stolen items she even found a missing grandmother who got lost once. Nina typed his phone number and called.

"Hey man! Mac said you had something to me." She said picking fresh clothes out of her bag jeans and a green blouse.

"Nina! Dear God! Where have you been all day. I fund us something and it's big. I was going to try find you at the dojo, are you there?"

"We agreed to keep these things smalls, Gavin, just 'cause I fund some stolen car once doesn't make me a PA, ok!" she switched the phone to speaker so she could take her training bra and leggings out to shower.

"Just meet me in the coffee store half way I tell you about it."

"Okay."

She hanged up and showered, felt the sore muscles begin to relax and the open cuts in her fists stein. She slid in the clothes she had picked and completing with a jacket and ankle boots. She hoped whatever Gavin had found would keep her mind busy and away from the gym for some time, Mac had been right, maybe was stress or maybe something darker but lately she couldn't bear an empty mind or quiet space for long without a feeling of been back at the house she grown up in. She could only hope whatever Gavin had was good enough to keep her head occupied.

…

In the coffee store she could see the young man seated at their usual table in the back she ordered black coffee walked to the table as the young man eyes thru the screen of the notebook and moved his fingers frantically thru the keyboard not even see her until after she seated.

"Nina!" He startled. "Don't get mad! We said we would keep this thing small but I talked to Joe again an-"

"No! No." She interrupted. "I'm not doing it, whatever it is-" She said as barista brought her coffee.

"You didn't even hear it." Gavin started to protest as he always did. It always was like this, two kids fighting the only way they discussed anything.

"Gav no you never even seen him, this guy deals with robbers and never asks questions... I'm not going to deal with an online pawn man. No way."

"We're not working with him, ok. Some police man offered him eight thousand for a stolen Iten a safe box the was lost in transport here in Sacramento, apparently, he was the one doing the transport, don't want to lose his job but is not getting any luck finding it. Joe said he'll give us the contact if we think we can find it. I don't see why not."

Nina had good reasons not to want anything to do with Joe's business; He had about no moral standers, sold all kinds of illegal and stolen goods and had no word you could trust. But she had no reasons not to trust Gavin, if he said his contact was good, she'd follow it, she always listened to Gavin.

"Do you even know who the guy is?"

"He gave me his badge number the location and department check. He wants the box, only needs the location and will take it from there."

"Do you have any Idea where do we start?"

…

Gavin had more than one idea. It didn't take them long to figure all out. The ambush had happened in their area, making it easier for her to find someone who could be related to the crime. The next day they went seen Crag, a mechanic Nina knew, he worked non-regulated updates in cars. He pointed then at a storage unite a group of mans they believed were involved in the ambush mention. Those were the ones that, based in the images their "client" sent then. Nina had to do her job now so, later that day, Nina went to the place only to make sure it was the right place, should be simple.

…

'It's a trap.' the man thought to himself over and over, as if there was an alarm going in his head, he didn't know how to turn off. The leaking of the information of the package a SHEILD-Hydra top important one fitting a very specific description a cover story and a money reward. This had Hydra written all over, since Bucky had killed the first agents that tried to take him back in DC; and burned all of the safe houses he used on his way; then put as much distance between him and his handlers as he could. Hurting Hydra, after everything they did to him was a rush hard to ignore. Even with the soldier constantly trying to control his every move, and yet the temptation of doing something; just because he wanted to always felt like a screw you to Hydra and that he couldn't resist.

Braking in a storage shed with no windows wasn't as complicated as you'd think. He knew Hydra would be there waiting for him, when he got in and made sure to get an advantageous position in the steelwork in the ceiling, he could see four men, they were guarding a large wooden box about double their height in the back of the storage shed, he expected there would be more men he couldn't see. In the front, however, he could see what he hoped wasn't a complication. Some short girl with long black hair in a brown leather jacket sneaking in thru the front door 'God, can she make herself more obvious; clearly not trained to be doing it; definitively knows how to break a door open. Getting a civilian killed was in the plans, not even those shit bags from Hydra, enough killing."

It physically hurt to think that, knowing how much that simple thought would have displeased his masters 'leave no witness' that's how Hydra does things. He knew that if the fight got ugly keeping her out of these soldiers' line of fire would be hard. Not to mention his own if his persona took over. Anyhow, he didn't have time to make a plan; one of the Hydra agents came behind the girl, he saw her before she saw him and draw a gun at her head.

…

Nina's blood ran cold as she heard footsteps close behind her, too close, by the time she heard the draw and unlock of what she could only make out to be a gun been pointed at her head. She hatched one swift blow with her leg to the gun that fell. Her mistake; taking her eyes of her opponent when the gun fell, he dived in choking her with one hand and gagging her with the other. 'Come on Nina, no panicking, you still have 30 solid seconds before your air runs out.' The hand he used to gag her was her opening; she saw his elbow facing up and stroked it hard with hers. It hurt him more than it did her cause he grunted and his grip loosen up enough, she throw him another kick this time to his side to what he recoiled a few steps but repay her almost immediately with a blow to her face. Nina's world went dark for a fraction of a second but enough that when the lights back, her hands had to stop her body before her head hit the ground too hard.

She looked up, the man had pulled yet another gun on her. This time she knew there was nothing she could do about it; he was too far away. He unlocked the gun when. She could just steer at the barrel but the shot never came, instead the man fell limp between her and a longue haired man wearing gloves she never heard coming. He walked to her and pulled her up by the arm as if she weighted nothing. Before her shock could subside even a little, the man started to walk her out without a word, but he stopped on the way to the door. He looked at her as if not sure of what to do, and maybe a little scared. Nina didn't think he had the time to decide before they were surrounded, three men came in their front, she looked back and two more stood behind them.

"You are a long way from home, soldier." One of the men said.

"You are here to take me home, you could never beat me before Russell, what do you think will be different this time?" The man said, still holding Nina's arm.

"Just come, I brought you something I'm sure you miss." the grip in Nina's arm tighten enough to hurt and she did what she could not to flinch. "Let's go, bring your friend." Russell said and the two ones beside him followed, Nina looked back looked back and the two others behind them motioned with their guns, Nina and the mysterious man to follow.

They stopped in the back of the shed in front of a large wood box, to fitted the description Gavin had given Nina the day before. One of the men jammed a crowbar in the side of the box and opened it reviling a chair with several mechanisms and Nina couldn't begin to imagine what those did.

"They said to give you your orders; you are to come back to Siberia after you sit on that thing." The man said pointing at the chair. "Or I can just kill you. Party is over; you ether came with us or they will shut the winter soldier project down, something about you been more trouble then you're worthy with the Capitan looking for his missing friend, you know." he said with a laugh. "I had no idea. You; James Barnes an American hero, I sh-"

"You know what Russell, there is something I can always count on with you. You talk too much" Two explosions from the entry were the cover he'd been waiting. He pushed Nina and she felt herself flying over some boxes, away from the fight but she wasn't hurt. She looked up and could see the soldier, James or whatever his name was. He took the man beside him out with one punch and throw the other over Russell, knocking over the other two guys like he was a doll. The four of them fell but only Russell and one of his man got up. The men pulled a gun at James who put his left arm in front of his face and it deflected the bullets, he ran in the man's direction he escaped two of the Soldiers punches but could do nothing against the leg he lunched to his side and fell.

Russell pulled a long bat with a taser top and stared hitting James' back. The man that had just been flied like a football ball, got up and did the same. Nina felt a shiver thru her whole body hearing the man's screams when he fell. Two against one, not fair in Nina's counts. The boxes she landed over got opened, she looked inside trying to find something she could use. She picked a kind of a car part, big enough to fit in her hands. She ran back in the fight throwing the part in one of the man's head he stopped hitting James and turned to her trying to get her with the bat and missing she pined his armed arm with hers, then hit him with her left twice. He broke free, tried to get her again and missed she caught his arm again. This time she used his arm hitch the man's body to the floor using her back and her whole body's strength, taking the bat from the man's hand in their turn. It only took on touch of that thing to take the guy out cold.

James and Russell's fight ended one second before Nina's since Russell stopped his strikes when Nina entered the fight. He lost his attention for long enough for James to take the weapon off him and knock him out. He walked to the chair but bent down in a grunt on his way, Nina instinctively ran for him but he got up and pulled a small device from his hood an put it front of the chair turned it on. "We have to get out of here." he said walking to her and picking her by the arm to get them outside.

"My car is that way" She said pointing to the front of the place. They made it to the car but he fell again holding his side with his left arm, when Nina notice a metallic glow coming for it and it all clicked in her head. She had just fought Hydra.

Nina wrapped the man's arm around her neck and helped him up "Come on, I'll get you out of here before the cops come." She set him in the passenger seat and ran to take the driver's seat and driving away. Before she could make the first turn, she heard a big explosion coming for the stored unit and a mumble from the man beside her.

"What the hell?! Did you do tha-" She screamed at him but the man seamed unconscious, she tried to shake him to no response "Fuck! Just do me a favor and don't die in my car, ok?"


	2. The Man Running Out Of Time

James leaned on Nina in their way inside her house. Even without knowing him, the girl could tell his head hurt way more than the injury in his side; the way he held his head and kept his eyes closed in every bump they hit in their way there was prove. She walked him to the couch. When he set, James' head dropped too fast to the arm of the couch, surprising the girl who tried to catch him a little too late. He hit his head in the side of the couch, letting out a pained grunt that caused Nina to sigh helpless. She left the room, disappearing into the hallway for a minute.

She came back into the living room with her first aid kit, and started getting his shirt out of the way, checking the gunshot to the side of his lower chest. It wasn't serious, just a scratch. Nina kneeled down to clean it; she wished she could say it was the worse she'd ever seen but the girl had had her own sheer of fights and stunts that didn't end well; It was a bad cut but wasn't bleeding anymore. If she knew how, she'd stitched it up, but the stitchless tape she used on herself whenever she got a bad cut would have to cover it for now.

"Those men back there, they were Hydra weren't them?" She said when she was finishing the stitches, careful not to sound intruding and upset him. He was silent and didn't seem bothered by her scrubbing and poking at his cut in the slightest. "Were they there to kill you?"

"Maybe, I don't know. If they wanted me dead there isn't much they need to do anyway."

"What do you mean?" she said stopping thru her last stitch but he got up suddenly, focusing his eyes on the girl. She felt him cut thru her like a laser, and started leaning away until her back touched the coffee table behind her.

"Why are you helping me? What's in it to you?"

"You didn't have to help me back there, did you?" She narrowed. "If you were there for the Hydra guys you took down, or wanted to destroy that thing; like you did… You didn't have to help me either."

"Do you not know who I am?" Not so much the question, it was what he implied that angered the girl.

She wasn't crazy, she knew him and what he'd done, it doesn't mean she wouldn't look for answers, look to know what was it she almost died for tonight. She finished the stitch with one move and took the kit back to her bathroom leaving the man alone. She came beck but walked to the kitchen and started to make some tea it would be a long night; he was a runaway and she knew what that was like.

…

Three weeks earlier

He could keep running for a few more miles but keep going on foot would make him too exposed. This mission had no margin for error, so there was no rendezvous location if everything had gone according to plan he would've just waited in the helicarrier until Pearce got there 'ice' he realized what that would mean for him 'forgetting'. No, against all the screaming pain in his head for disobeying he had pulled the man in red, white and blue of the river 'I'm with you to the end of the line.' Those words they meant something.

The man in red, white and blue walked to him and handed him the sniper. 'I'll see you, when the base is down' the man said trying to make it sound easy.

'I don't know if I like this Steve.' It was the first time he was out of the front line, the first time they were separated since Italy and he couldn't help to feel like something would go wrong if he wasn't there, couldn't help the fear for his friend been alone down there if he had no way to protect him.

'You're the best damn shut here, better than me, I need the best man on it... To the end of the line.' He took the sniper and shook the man's hand.

That's why he ran there was something more to him he always knew, something was wrong he just had never been able to name it before. He didn't know why someone would go that far to try in get him to remember but he was thankful, looking at that man, at his sweet pained eyes as he had bagged him not to make him fight, then, after that giving up the fight after his work was done 'he'd die for me' he didn't know why, but even there he felt if places were reverses he'd do the same. He found a parking lot, took a motorcycle and got away.

…

James tried to take deep breath in; he could ignore the pain in the side of his chest, it wasn't so bed and yet his head were still giving him hell pumping and aching in a white pain that made him sick to his stomach. He was glad the girl had walked away and stopped asking him questions, that was making it all even worst. He looked down to his side the cut wasn't so bed the room was dark and he couldn't see much just enough to imagine he would be healed by the end of the week.

Down the side he found his shirt and jacket, he wasn't sure when he took those off, it didn't matter, he just tried to put it back on without vomiting. He looked around and tried to take in his surroundings; the kitchen, to his front, had a window probably his best way out; the hallway, where the girl had gotten the first aid kit some time ago, had to have a bathroom, it was likely another scape if it had a window.

'Breathe, it's not like she would make you stay if you wanted to leave.' Based on what he saw earlier; it was not like she could. He could see the girl occupying herself in the kitchen. She had broken in, in the middle of Hydra's plans; he could only hope none of those men would mark her face. If they found out who she was, she would be as good as gone.

…

After two days he was still in Washington DC got a change of clothes and a fake ID 'Dustin Jones' bad name but would do it for now. 'James Buchanan Barnes' the man's words, no, Steve's words were he's only lead, he followed it all the way to the Smithsonian in the city's center. Braking into a public building was always an easy task, too many exits and enters to choose from. The entrance had posters of Captain America all over 'how convenient' it seemed too open but he rolled a dice.

The exposit was legit 'James Buchanan Barnes' that name and face were in every corner with stories of fight, victory and friendship, his face near the faces of heroes from a country he was pushed to hate, his country. The bittersweet memory he had a few days ago wasn't alone anymore; over the last two nights every time he closed his eyes all he got were rampant of disconnected memories, memories of blood and pain, his blood and his pain, his body and mind been torn apart and put together again. All those did were make it harder for him to function during the day, he had to wait and see if the images would leave him before he could keep moving. Except one memory that came when he was close to his way out.

There were three enters to choose from, the west wing's second floor window was the one with the least security he picked that one the man was supposed to be alone in the Embassy's top office, he wasn't. His secretary had chosen that night to get a late shift. She walked in after she shot the man twice, when he was about to go out the girl didn't have time to scream before he put two bullets on her as well. His orders were clear no witnesses.

The vision caught him of guard slipping into one of the restrooms. It took him sometime to understand that what had happened wasn't here or now and for him to come back from it. When he did they were waiting for him outside. Two armed men coming from his left, he knew the stairs were to his right, he went that way and the men followed him up. When he got to the third floor the door was kick open in front of him, two men with guns came out he was able to grab the first one and threw him down the stairs gap the other shut him at his metal arm and the bullet ricocheted; he moved so fast the man didn't have the time to shot again. James hit his chest with his arm and he went flying out the stair way, falling unconscious after hitting a wall. That floor was empty and he continued running down the hallway.

…

The girl came back and put a mug and two pills in front of him. "These don't work on me." She raised an eye brown to his comment not looking exactly surprised.

"I do know who you are." She stared, calmly. "You're not the first person I met with a story. The thing is; I need to know what happened back there so I can be ready, do you understand that?" She said seating in the chair near him, he gave her simple nod. "Yesterday, my frien... my contact called me saying a cop need help finding lost evidence."

"That was Hydra's man. They spread the story about the convoy from DC. It was a set up to try in get me there… You heard about them yesterday?" he asked confused by her timing, a little too fast.

"Yeah, and my contact conveniently forgot to mention anything about Washington." She would kill Gavin for that, he knew she would never agree to it if she heard of Washington. "So they just set a quest with a reward to see if it would lead to you and killed anyone that shows there at the wrong time?"

He gave her another nod. Nina sigh and felt her blood run cold, however little information she had on Hydra, it was enough to know you can't help their most valuable asset escape and blow up their machines. Those men were still alive, the explosion of the chair wouldn't be enough to kill then all. They would learn who and where she was and If desperate times had ever seeing desperate measures, Nina took her chance. "They said you had your orders but you chose not to follow then, why?"

He turned pale. The pain in his head came back as strong as it was in the shed with Russell, lucky for him, and Nina's carpet, the pain gave out after a few shaky breaths. "I'm not… The things I did… What I can remember… I'm not doing that again. I don't want to ever do that again."

"But you did go back there for that chair. You'd risk your life for that. You want that? To get back at then?"

…

James ran all the way to the roof, he was trapped as more hydra agents came after him, he fought them. He was not coming back he'd never feel that pain again He'd never forget again. He didn't hold back in the fight either, if those men had anything to do with all the bad he'd done they deserved death and he would give it to them. He about to finish off the last man holding him by the neck of his shirt but his eyes caught sight of an older man standing at some distance, dressed in a distinctive Hydra uniform he'd seen before. This man just stood aside waiting for the fight to resume, James knew him, he was the one of the man he saw on his dreams reading words in Russian when he was seated in the chair. His distraction with the familiar face gave the man below him time to pull out his gun but not enough time to discharge it James took the weapon from his hand and shot him with it, walking to the man that had been standing to the side.

"What a waste." The man said from a distance "Hydra's top trained man, killed by their own comrade. All because you failed you mission, you disobeyed our orders." The response to those words was immediate he had to stop and close his eyes, it felt like a bomb going off in his brain.

"What you think was going to happen, you would go off on your own, abandon everything you fought to build." That was it. For a second his anger was bigger than the pain, it was all he needed. He ran and punched the man breaking his nose; landing with his kneels on top of the man chest gun pointing to the man's face.

"You were there… When they put me on that machine you gave the order to erase me, you and Pierce… You did this to me!"

"You're not going to kill me." The man said while trying to breathe "You can't!"

"Why? Give me one reason why I shouldn't end every last one of you." The man looked at him in disbelief he was going to die and he knew it.

"You'll never live long enough. You have to go back with me now, or the pain you feel will get worse and worse until your body gives out." The man spited the words out. "You're gonna die Winter Soldier and we all know you don't want to die."

"I'll take my chances." He shut the man in the man in the head and fell back and looked around; about a dozen of man all of them killed, violence was all he knew anymore even if he wanted to live this was all he'd ever have; more violence. He felt his eyes burning and his hand were shaking when he looked down at them. He didn't want to die and he didn't want to kill anyone ever again he just didn't know what to do so he ran, and ran putting as much distance between him and hydra as he could master.

…

The girl's comment made his stomach do leaps he let his head tilt back down in the couch and tried to take a still breath forcing the sickness to quiet. "Drink your tea, you lost a lot of blood... Was that all for you; with Hydra I mean, is it over?"

He took another shaky breath 'God why do I feel so shitty? Can't this just be over?'

"No!" He answered out loud to his own messed up mind, he wasn't about to give up. But the girl was still there looking at him dumb-faced like she saw a ghost. He remembered she asked him a question "I don't mean... I mean yes; I'm not done, that's just not what I was talking about... I..." He struggled to keep his stomach under control but Nina could see he was turning a little green.

"There's a bathroom down the hallway."

He just let his head drop between his legs holding his side to keep the stitches the girl made from popping open. The cut hurt and burned and he tried to focus on that pain and nothing else for a moment, taking several deep breaths.

"Do you feel sick?" He didn't answer, she moved closer to him. "Do you need something? Anything in this world if you could have it now what would it be?"

He looked forward and swallowed hard. "There is a man, Anton Vasliev, he was responsible for a red notebook. I need to find him, I don't think I have much time. I know what you're doing... You want protection from Hydra; if you can find it, I'll stay here and no one will hurt you, help me find it."

He was blunt and direct leaving her wild eyed. "You're right, I… I do need protection. But the thought of sticking it to Hydra... I don't think any sane person would say no. I have a spare bedroom and I don't think you can help anybody now. Go there take the rest of the night, we'll talk about this tomorrow." He nodded, but just laid back in her sofa, Nina took the hint. She took her notebook and walked to her own room, she had research to do.


	3. The Day After

"No Mac, I'm fine I promise… Yeah, it's just for today… Yeah, I'll tell Gavin, we both own you. Ha! Fine, I'll admit you were right about him. Thanks for covering for me…"

He heard a woman's voice distant and quiet, almost whispering words to a phone. James tried to take a deep breath but the injury to his side remained him of the last night's adventures; and of that chair. Shit, it was too early for memories and he had been avoiding them like the plague, they were mostly bad and use to come back to him every night. Lately, if he went about his day and kept his mind in other things they would mostly be gone by the middle of the day; that kept him together enough to keep throwing hits at Hydra or keeping his distance when he needed. He was surviving, sure, but he was no closer to figure out who he was then he'd been three weeks ago when he heard Steve's pled in the helicarrier.

He opened his eyes and tried to look around the girl was behind the counter in the kitchen in front of him; the small girl had hair up on a ponytail while talking in her cellphone looking out a window above the kitchen table. "Bye, love you." She practically whispered to someone in the other side, hanging up and turning to the coffee maker

"Good morning! How you feeling?" She called pouring her coffee.

Dragging himself up from the couch was as a laborious work, as it usually was in the morning. If he wasn't sure alcohol didn't work on him, he'd think he had a monster hang over. She came to the room with a cup of coffee and her notebook, taking seat in the armchair at his side. She tried not to pry as he struggled to pull himself from the seat.

"You think we can start?" She said putting her mug in the coffee table in front of him and opening her notebook.

"Now?"

"Yeah, I was up late last night and... well I didn't find much." She pointed a remote at the celling, she didn't have a TV but there was a projector there, turned to the entrance door. "I decided to start with the name you gave me, got nothing. No registers, civil or amongst the people arrested following the fall of shield, I'm working with the idea that he is free and working with the men we saw last night. The book you spoke about, I assumed it was Hydra's during the fall so my two theories are; It's either with the stolen items from the convoy we were looking for or those guys bosses have it hidden somewhere. Anyways, we go back to the guys from last night."

"Is that all you found?"

"Have a little faith," The projector came alive, and she stared typing in a notebook three blurred surveillance like pictures were projected in the wall with names and a few lines of information on each. "Those three men were there last night, alright." it wasn't a question but he agreed anyway. "Two of them had no records. I found, however, records on the middle one in an organization we know. You said his name was Russell." She pointed at the blue-eyed guy James had talked to last night. "He was SHIELD. No convictions for any crimes according to police records. You sounded like you knew him."

"How did you get their pictures? Or the SHIELD files?"

"My contact, when the SHIELD files were dumped online it gave access governmental computers for a split of seconds. which meant that he and a few members of the Rising Tide were able to gain accesses to SHIELD's network; he was able to save the files before government secured their systems again, Gavin, the hacker and my friend, got interested in you in particular he has information that can be useful. I want to ask him to come later, if that's ok."

"You trying to impress me?" She let out a rich laugh and continued.

"I thought you may want to change your mind. What do you say do we have a deal?" she lifted her hand for shake and he just regarded her. "I'm Nina, by the way."

"We have a deal." he said but didn't move to touch her and she let her hand drop.

"And what should I call you?" He looked at her like it was the first time anyone had asked him that and he didn't have an answer. "I will never call you Winter Soldier, ever. You better make something up." he tried to think, Bucky didn't sound like a real name, so maybe the next best thing could be…

"James. It's James."

"It's great making business with you James. Now, what should I know about this Anton Vasliev and his book?" He told her the indispensable. Anton was colonel in the Russian base he was kept, he told her that Anton and another general where responsible for knowing everything about him, all of Zola's research. He never mentioned been kept froze or that Anton was the third colonel he met thru those years, that those men were the responsible for his discipline to keep him in the line, or that Zola's research was made mostly while he was awake.

Those details were in his mind though, making his voice go quitter and his eyes to hit the ground every time he hit another land mine planted in the back of his mind, somewhere near where he was pushing these memories to.

"This is gonna take a little longer than I expected. We'll start with the former Hydra colonel, anyone connected to him, lest known locations, anything we can learn about him and... I called my friend about half an hour ago." He gave her a condoning look. "I still got the spare room you ignored last night, if you don't want him to see you just go there he won't bother you." She got even more of the deadly steer but just rolled her eyes at it. "You should be hungry, there's coffee and bread in the kitchen." She went back to her research but smile a little when he took her word and walked to the kitchen.

…

Nina read thru old and new files Gavin either left in her computer or thought her to access. Every time she stumbled on a new SHEILD related file she didn't know was hidden in her drive or didn't find something she needed she thought of punching Gavin, James had been right she was putting up a show for him earlier that wasn't her expertise and she would need that hacker if she wanted out of this.

And yet, all this was his fault, she wouldn't be stuck having to harbor a fugitive if it wasn't for him. Hydra was an old obsession of hers; history of the WWII was more interesting to study when you make everything about heroes and villains, Hydra was her big bad wolf growing up and if any of the stories she'd seen were right; she knew there were no prisoners within Hydra, they get to her it was over. If the if the ghost known as the fist of hydra had really switched sides, she'd ride it with him, see where it take her.

After another twenty minutes looking for anything interesting. She heard a sound from the front door's lock. James heard it too and stared to walk carefully to the living room but she waved urgently for him to go hide back in kitchen. She put her computer aside and walked to the front door; the door opened and she pained the men that came out in the desk beside the door.

"Convoy of evidence was from the Washington fiasco, hum? Care to explain yourself jackass?" She said holding the red-haired to the table.

"Nina I…" He struggled against the table but she let him go. "I was reckless. I'm sorry, you know I needed the money, I didn't think it would be a problem…" he said moving into the room but stopped when he noticed they weren't alone. He looked wild eyed to the other man standing there like tower with his metal arm, looking him like he could end Gavin before he could think of saying anything.

"It was a problem. We almost died; Men how could you do that?" He looked like a prey frozen in front of a wild predator and Nina didn't have the time to feel bad for the guy. "The people that were shooting at us last night, they might still be after us I need you to find them." He swallowed hard and had the good sense of keeping his questions for a better time; he got his own note book from the backpack he brought with him and stared looking into both his and Nina's data's all at once.

Nina walked past James; the angry man stood in the living room for a moment longer but followed her back to the kitchen.

"Gavin shouldn't take too long to have a location in one of those men, I can't find then as fast as him." She said running a hand thru the tense muscles in her back.

"You told me you were gonna wait to get him here. You said he didn't need to see me." He said using his size to trap her in one of the corners, but she answered him with an angry look.

"I want this over! And so do you, we need help finding those men and he is the best chance to do it fast..." she said it all at once, it was all true and she hoped James would get used to have the boy around. His anger didn't eased and she tried again slower. "The night we met, you said if they want you dead there isn't much they need to do. Are you...?"

"I don't know, I don't feel worse but I don't feel better ether. Even if I'm not dying; I'm not the kind of guy that lasts, not anymore. I need this done." She observed him carefully; he looked tired far beyond the loss of blood and the poorly slept night at the sofa. But he was being honest, and giving her as much true as she thought he could at that point. Nina knew that if he trusted her enough to give her his truth, she could show him she'd listen and try to understand; that way she could not only get close to him easier but maybe she could trust him too. Anyway, she wanted to decide about him for herself and not for the humors.

"If it's hydra; they are dirties. Couldn't they just be trying to play you? Twisting the truth isn't what they do? When I was looking into SHEILD/HYDRA after it fell, I read-"

"Guys I found something." Gavin called from the other room before she finished. "Maybe a base where they were located; I found the Russell guy you talked about. He's been in and out this real state building for a few days."

"Hydra doesn't have bases in California." James said checking what the boy was looking in his computer. "The best they would have here are safe houses or cover companies."

"You recognize any of these men?" Gavin asked turning the scream to James. There were surveillance videos of a business building where Russell walked in with five other men, James looked but didn't recognize any of them.

"What about the name I was looking at you found anything?" Nina asked if she was still mad her voice didn't show.

"He's Russian, I found an ID in the name Anton Vasliev, seems real. I can't look into official documents from the Kremlin from here, I'm asking another girl from the European Rising Tide to do it for me, she'll contact when she finds something. In the mean time I keep recording the surveillance from this outside building and the red book, if it was lost evidence, I would have found something in it by now, there were only two recovered files about you and neither with that description. What do you want to do next?"

"I don't know, really"

"Dude, I was asking her." Nina smiled a 'sorry' at James; Gavin had no filter.

"We can wait until you friend turn up with something on Anton but until then see what you can tell me about the building where Russell is hiding; there might be way we can go in it and maybe bug the place, after that we wait till we know more, good?" she asked James who just gave her a quick head shake. "Okay why don't you actually go check that bedroom a told you about, you just got shot I'll order some food if something else comes up we call you."

"You were shot?" James didn't answer just got up and went to the room.


	4. Breaking And Entering

Nina parked her car by Mac's dojo. Mac wasn't there this late. It was night fall, Gavin got her the address but she needed her gear. She took the keys and followed down to the basement, she hid some of the stuff she used when working with Gavin there. Her intention was to go in and out of the real state building before James could miss her in the house. When the hamburgers and fries she ordered came in She left him with Gavin, without much of a look to the food, just trying to make sure James would have something to eat when he got up.

Two days ago, when she was trying to put holes in Mac's punishing dummy with her hands, all she wanted was something to take space in her mind. Now, she remembered her mother's words telling her to be careful with what she wished for. The thought made har smile as she walked up the steers with her box 'Well mom, if I was always careful, I'd never be able to take care of myself; and I would've never crossed ways with James. If you could see him now, I know you would be hitting me with the dirtiest jokes about his abs, just like you used to.' Nina whispered to herself. When her mom was alive she had the dirtiest sense of humor, she didn't care how young Nina was either, they were best friends sense Nina's birth.

...

The address, for the real state building wasn't so far from the dojo, in the city's business center. She parked her car near the entrance and waited, looking around a little. There were a couple of men outside talking and laughing. It was three stores, glassed building, with a fire scape to the side in the ally. It was close enough to neighbor building for a jump. Security in places like this is usually weak, but a criminal organization would toughen it up. Nina decided to take another try at the hydra agents, she would never be able to do what James asked her without more information; beside breaking and entering was always what she did best.

It was easy enough to climb up to the near building roof, it's not like dry cleaner stores were famous for its detailed security. The building was one floor shorter than the real state one and Nina wanted to try getting in thru the roof; less chance of it been liked to some kind of alarm or anyone been there. She made her leap and landed holding the outside of steers protection bars; she jumped in and made her way up the last set of steers to the roof there was a door she had to picky the lock to get in.

The first floor was clear, there were only boxes and other files cabinets there. She wasn't there to look into any of that, for now, all she wanted was to find a way down. She found the steers leading to the second floor; no one in the hallways. There was a kind of a meeting room there, surrounded in glass. She put the bug inside a power plug in half a minute; like she had trained with Gavin. Near that room she found a kind of main administrative room; a place that looked fit for a company president. She tried the door but he wasn't there, the whole office was unusually empty. She put a bug there too and got out. She would just have to try to get out thru where she came. She was heading back to the fire steers two arms wrapped around her body, Nina felt herself been dragged into one of the rooms in the hallway, before she could make a noisy something cold touched her face, stopping her from scream or say anything.

"Don't talk, there are two more guys coming. You'll hear them." Sure enough, Nina heard two men walk by, talking lowly about something she couldn't understand. Their voices faded but the grip in her body didn't.

"James. Can you let me go now?" His flesh arm held her standing in her tip toes, when he loosened his grip she almost fell over someone laying there.

"Oh my god." She gasped and said, in a low voice. She tried to walk back a couple of steps but bumped in James' chest. "Did you kill him?"

"No, just knocked him out. You're so god damn obvious, we're lucky the police 'aim coming. If this place had one more guard, we both would be good as dead. He shouldn't be like this for long." he said going for the door's handle. "Came, the way is clear. Just stay close" Nina redden ashamed of having to be saved again.

"There is another one coming, be quiet." He said on their way up the steers, he picked a little paper ball of his pocket, lit its tip on fire and threw it in the vents.

Nina heard someone behind them when they got to the end of the steers but there was a pop from the vents, the guard must have it too because he went back to check it. "That was gun powder in a paper bag, works every time. If ever break in again, bring some with you." he said in the same tone she used to talk to the kids in her dojo; patronizing, but she knew she could use it. "let's go, we need to get the hell out of here."

They took the fire steers back to the ally. James helped Nina down the last set of steers to the floor, it was missed its steps. He tried his best to only hold her up with his flash hand not to accidentally hurt her body. He put her down, not letting go of her waist; his eyes on the street, then suddenly pushed her to the wall. Nina didn't fight him; her arm still wrapped in the bottom of his shirt, afraid he heard something she didn't. They stayed like this against the wall for a second. He heard her breathing became heavier and looked down at her eyes, she was peeping at his lips.

He held his breath; this was something he hadn't tried yet and he couldn't think of a single reason not to. He leaned down and placed his lips on hers. He knew what to do, he remembered it; he recalled been in a similar ally with far less light. It was night, she had her arms around his neck, both their breathings were heavies and their bodies moved like magnets in the dim light. Filling any inch of distance that treated to keep them from felling each other's warmth. It brought him a smooth, calm and comforting feeling that wrapped his body; the first really nice memory he got. He realized maybe there were others. Other memories, other moments hided back in his mind he wasn't new to the word like he'd been felling ever since the helicarrier. He'd had a life before that, a normal one.

He broke the light touch he'd placed in her lips, looking back to the street. Nina saw the man that was knocked out in the broom closet a minute ago pass by looking for someone in the side walk.

"Did you really wanted to kiss me, or were you just trying to play it for the guards?" she asked with no ceremony, smirking at him when she knew the guard went away.

"I pushed you because of the guards; I kissed you because you wanted to kiss me. Your skin heated, your breathing was heavier, your heart was betting faster..." She opened her mouth to protest but closed it; she knew her checks had turned pink and was no pint in arguing, she just smiled turning even more red.

"let's get out of here before anyone else see us." He said holding a chuckle at her embarrassment, and pulling her to the car by the arm.

…

Gavin was still waiting for them back in the house. He was the best person to connect the bugs safely and make sure no one would accidentally detect their signal. Nina set in the arm chair near the couch as usual; James just stood in the entrance of the kichen, shutting dark glares at Gavin, still distrustful of the boy.

"That's it we're in. I disguised our signal, anyone that connect to it will just think the dry cleaner next door has a really great Wi-Fi." he said, doing last adjustments before the sound came on. They could hear a conversation between two men, they spoke in different language nether Nina nor Gavin understood. "This is the first one, you said it was a meeting room. Is this Russian?"

"It's German. They are talking about Russell and what happened last night." James answered. The two men said Russell had what he deserved after losing the chair on their new commander's orders. They kept on 'The new führer is coming, this will be over in days.' one of them said in German. 'Russell was a bastard but he was right as long as we have the girl, they can never kill the serpent, three more heads will grow. When we get the Soldier for her, we can go back home.' James body went cold, he could taste bile in the back of his throat. He wrapped his metal arm around his chest and put his flash hand in his chin taking a deep breath. "They killed Russell, there's a new commander."

He wasn't telling them everything, Nina picked up on that. She shot a look to Gav and he knew it was time to leave; it was getting late anyway. He picked his stuff and hugged Nina goodbye. James sank into the couch where Gavin was a minute ago, steering hard ahead, into nothing in particular. Nina leaned her back in the counter

"You speak German, Russian and a bunch of other languages. I suppose." he gave her no answer; she assumed a yes. "What else did you hear? Thay said something else there; I can see it scared you. What was it?" She said trying to sound comprehensive but he snapped.

"I'm scared? I'm only here because you were scared, you kept me in this town. You wanted answers, so you questioned me. you brought yourself into this! And now you're telling me, I'm the scared one?"

"Men, that's so typical." She threw back in a dry laugh. "Hydra is on my ass! I would be an idiot not to be scared. Why would I say I'm not? For pried? To look tough? I 'm telling you; I. don't. Want. To. die! at least I can admit it, what about you James?"

"What does that mean?" His voice went back to the emotionless calm he always had.

"Are you not scared? Really? Because I saw the way you looked at that machine last night, the way griped my arm when he motioned orders. So, I'm asking you; What did you hear there? what could they do to you? What could they do to James Buchanan Barnes in Russia, he came back someone else?"

"They wiped my memories, all of them." It hit him when she mentioned Russia, he never told her he was kept there; he wasn't telling her everything, nether were she. She had a hacker for a best friend; she knew about the dumbed files and, even with the cryptography, she and her friend read a good portion of then. Between the two of them, Nina probably knew the more about his past, so he told her something she didn't know. "They keep me frozen in some kind of cryogenic machine in Russia; when they needed me, they would wake me up, I'd seat in that chair and it would wipe all my memories. I don't remember anything; I read my birth date in a museum; I only knew I had a name because Steve told me... Every time I have a memory from my past I just shove away, I don'-" His voice broke but he swallowed it. "It was all just bad anyway. I know Steve was my best friend and I know could've killed him and felt nothing. After that, I wanna forget. I know it makes me a monster but I can't live with it."

Nina felt tears trying to escape her eyes; the first day she met him she could tell he wasn't just some guy, good or bad, he wasn't your regular person. When she knew he was the 'metal armed villain' they talked about on TV, it made her even more confused. The man standing in front of her was no villain. If he had no memories and was forced to do what he did, the monsters were those responsible for it, not him. He was dangerous, obvious, but when Nina looked at him. She would never call him a villain.

"In the audio they mention the serpent, they are a group of enhanced people, they are close to Anton. they can find me. They have ways to make me go back; Nina, I don't want to die a monster." His voice broke again, this time he didn't hide it, face was raw and his eyes were red. He was about to fall apart. "I don't want to go back" He did fall apart. For once though, he wasn't angry just scared and crushed. He was, also, as far away from the calm rage that was the soldier as he'd ever felt, he could take a little pain for that.

Nina walked to the couch to sit by his side but he just wiped his tears in the hoody he was wearing got up and moved away to the hallway despairing into the spare room. Nina sighed and she still needed to leave tomorrow to LA; there were bills that needed paying and she still had a job there. Though James assure her the guard he knocked out would be in much more trouble than them if he ever said anything about the breaking in, she still wouldn't let James leave just yet. While she was out of town, she would ask Gavin to look out for James for her. James still didn't trust him much; but maybe, in time, there were something she could do about that, when she returned.


	5. Missing Girl

*Warning*

*Warning*

*Warning*

This chapter contains descriptions of child abuse. It contains some heavy H/C so if this content is too heavy for you, just skep it. It will not be central to the story line and I'll be posting again next week. I guess this stuff was just hanging half forgotten in my subconscious, when I reread this recently I realized it could be very sensitive, but I didn't wanted to hide it or just threw it away. If you really feel that you can read it: here we go.

...

Finally, the sun was out. This was California and it's not supposed to rain in California, not ever if you asked Nina. Kind of unreasonable but not everything has to make sense. She was just a couple of blocks from her house when she saw the first rays of sun in three days and, God, she hoped James was alright.

Four days ago, before she left to do a stunt double job in LA, she stopped by the supermarket nearby and made sure to leave behind enough food and emergency numbers for the half week. James Promised, kind out of nowhere, he would keep the house in order until she returned, which made her checks turn a little pink. She never had much help around the house. Her reaction had him laughing a little; she knew she would miss these little moments. Affectionating herself for him had proven easy, so did missing him but she didn't call him and neither did he, safer that way. Gavin had no news from Anton or the book; soon Nina would have to think of something else to track him.

She nearly hoped her way into the house but her excitement was cut short; James set curled in ball in the wall opposite to the entrance, he was sweaty but still wearing his thick hoody and sweet paints with no shoes. Nina knew he could hear her, in fact, he heard her park outside, leaving the car without her bags. But he didn't move or even suggested to notice she was home. She walked quietly to him trying not to startle the guy; she got closer crunching down to his level. The large, 6-foot tall guy looked like a lost chill; his red eyes looked like ether he been crying or not sleeping since she left, maybe both.

"Hi dear, it's been a long time no see you." James didn't say anything or moved. Nina hated the silence. In the past week when he got angry or threatening, she could just ignore him, she could say something and he would focus in the task in hand, but the quiet, it was something she didn't know her way around yet. He just looked like he wasn't even from this world, like in the first time they met. She had a plan this time thought.

"Gavin called me on the way here said he had something serious for me, I don't know if I'm taking this one. A missing person case; which is something I've only done once; this one could get really dangerous." James sight, touching his knees with his forehead. "A Chinese girl, from a family near here. I know her uncle worked for the yakuza and she lived in a bad Neiborhood. I could use someone that can speak the language and watch out for me so I can help." He sighed "The money would be good. She's only eleven, her mom and dad would really like to see her again but they can't call the police... bet helping would do you good."

James's eyes closed than went back at the girl; she was amazing, big green eyes pleading him, he could swear he had seen that expression before but couldn't place it. The excitement he could read in her; despite her best efforts to council it still popped right out of her eyes, she wanted to go and find this girl. Could he blame her? Little kids shouldn't be wandering around by them self on the streets, that much he knew. He took a deep breath, he'd draw in the past another time, He looked back at her.

"You want me to help you find some missing kid?"

"Please, she's an only child." Nina said trying to be as sincere as possible.

"Ok." James sight looking down but getting up. He just looked at her. It took her a moment longer than she would like to admit, to notice he was waiting for her to tell him to do.

"We should go to the car." She said turning on her hills. "Gavin already looked the hospitals in the girl's area, I'll have to check detentions centers and shelters and this shouldn't take too long. They are not far from here but you'll have to wait in the car for these. We can't let anyone see you just strolling around town."

"Strolling?"

"Yeah like... Just don't let anyone see you and if you think of anything else, just let me know."

They drove around town for the rest of the day, the dark tinted car windows made good enough a cover for James, who just set quietly for the most of it. It all turned out for nothing, as they both expected. Nina came back from the last location talking in her phone James notice how much she had done with that throughout the day. He knew what smartphones were, but was still interesting watching her fingers move thru the screen as it answered almost every question she could have as long as she'd asked the right questions. He wished he could get one of those but he _knew_ what smartphones were and they were too risky.

'Too risky' that thought could have made him chuckle. If he was worried about risks what was he doing stopped in some poor girl's home. Nina had done a good job bugging Russell's office, Gavin was monitoring it and they haven't said anything about the girl yet. They got some interesting information in the comings and goings of Hydra, but nothing on Nina or plans for going back after James. As far as he knew she was safe, she was just so... He didn't know yet. He sure had liked to kiss her; and he sure hope he would have the chance to do it again; but he was staring to think she couldn't really help with Anton; it was all starting to feel like a mistake made when he was too weak to think.

"I was in the phone with the mom, May Ping, she speaks English but the husband doesn't they can meet with us tonight. Would you come in with me and listen, see if you pick up something?" James just nodded a yes. "Great, I'll drop you off after, you've done enough and I have somewhere else to go tonight" She said starting the car. "I talked to a girl in there who knew Saskia, the missing girl. She said Saskia was hanging out with a boy named Chace; that he and some other kids were going to a street party the day she went missing, I'll pass by there see if I can find something."

"Too many people?"

"Yes, I'm afraid so. But let's talk to the parents first, see what they know"

"You think this kid knows anything? Did you hear anything about him?"

"Chace Mannford; he was from the same school she went; same age;" When they stop at a red light she went back to her phone. "Plays basketball, his team won this state's Championship, what a boy! Cute too, Saskia really scored with this one." Nina said sarcastically.

"Light is green." He mumbled a little amused with the girl's enthusiasm.

"Okay you hold this." She said throwing the Phone his way "See if you can find anything in his social media" He didn't even try, just dropped the phone in his legs.

…

"That wasn't good" James said in the way back from Saskia's home. The whole conversation had been weird, the parents; Chao e May Pang, weren't definition of loving parents if James had ever seen any, but he hadn't, had him? Hydra's Soldier had no family, no nation, no home; no mother who would screen in anger after crying in relief once he made it home after leaving for a Carnival in Jersey and lost all his money and had to walk home with the other boys.

_'The tall woman with dark hair and red puff blue eyes hugged him in the morning when he made it home but sure followed it with a whole hour rent that he listen wile tried bravely to hold back tears and the unbelievably angry man made sure he followed the three week chars full length as punishment, after he assured him that if he ever scared his mom and dad like that again he'd have more than chores to worry about.'_ He had seen loving parents, he didn't know their names, he wasn't sure he remembered their faces right but he knew they existed, despite what he heard in Siberia.

The whole conversation made Nina inpatient really quickly; they left the house less the twenty minutes after they got there. She got to the car without a word and drove to her house. They were halfway there when he broke out of his own thoughts to meet her eyes but if it was possible the girl looked almost as anguished as he felt. Her, usually cheery, green eyes were dark and her face hard; she hasn't said a word all the way.

"I remembered my parents." he tried. "Or I think I did... They weren't like that."

"Lucky you, that's just how I remember mine." she said bitter but regretted immediately. "Sorry, I don't mean it. Wait you remembered your family?"

"I think... I think that's what it was, there was a woman crying one morning when I didn't come back home and a men _pufff_... he was angry but I think they cried before I got there and I think they were happy to see me; I don't remember they _say_ it but I think they were."

"Those were your parents James." She said running her hand thru her nose and snorting. "They worried that's why they cried and they loved you; that's why they were mad. My dad didn't care if I lived or died shipped me away first time he had the chance and then dragged me from the only real home I've ever had just cause it was convenient to him." she said and made a stop some where he didn't know. "I think Saskia parents didn't care for her either and that's why she isn't here now. Look, we haven't eaten all day this place has the best burgers in the world, I'll get us take out, and we'll see what we do after."

She got out of the car before he could protest. When she came back with the food he did say she didn't need to buy him food all the time; she just shoved it away saying he followed her around all day and was so patient not complaining once -not that he felt anything like talking at any time that day- buying dinner was the least she could do.

…

Nina wrapped her hair in a ponytail and turned to pic the food bags in the back seat. "I need to change, go ahead and eat if you're hungry." He smelled a grassy sent he wasn't familiar with; maybe he would take her in her offer and not even wait for her to get dressed. He did the kindness of opening the car door for her and take the keys, the bags from her trip were still seating in the trunk. He took those inside leaving them to the side of the door, Nina would take care of that later. She had left the food bags in the table and headed to her room. He took a minute to exam them, taking the food out. Cheesy fries; Some kind of crisp sticks with little black dots in then, maybe pepper; and really big Hamburgers. The smell was stronger than any other food he had before.

In the bed room the girl hurried throwing her jacket and shoes at a chair in the corner, near the window. She looked thru her dresser; shorts and an old Chicago White Sox shirt would do for now, and it didn't hurt it was one of her best fitting shirt's with cleavage and a form that hugged her curves nicely, she ignored the thought and ran back to the room, or the ill fed super soldier would eat all her food before she got there.

"You're not going to the carnival?" James asked when she sat next to him. "You said you wanted to talk to the people there."

"No. I want to look for the Chace kid. See what he's got to say about Saskia. Maybe she told him anything about her parents. If we're right about this family maybe he can confirm that then we have to see where she went."

"When we were there... the father... he keep saying in Chinese it was the mother's fault the girl 'got away' not gone missing but 'got away'. If you ran away at her age where would go?"

"Well, I would leave the state move to California, to try to be a stunt double. When that didn't work right away, just take a bunch of other jobs like Kong foo sensei, Privet detective or whatever. Until I met some wanted guy and worked missing cases with him. Especially if he is not bad at it and real cute too." He choked a little on his food, Nina covered her mouth with her hand trying not to laugh at his reaction. James didn't understand how he end up spending so much time with someone he knew so little about, reckless again. Reckless was really a part of him he wasn't used to.

"You ran away?"

"Yeah, I did actually. You see, when my mom died my dad sent me to live with my brothers in Scotland, but about three years later he got engaged to a woman that couldn't get pregnant so he dragged me back, I was thirteen. Things ware good for some time with her there, she was nice. But after, things went back to the way they were before my mom died and-".

Nina's voice went little above a whisper than broke. James's heart clenched. Why anyone would do anything bad to a little girl was beyond him. The girl eyes got a little wets and he raised his flash hands to wipe it away and ended running it in her hair. She leaned in his touch and moved forward, kissing him gently. He put his metal hand in her waist and running it up her back pulling her closer. She kissed him harder; ran her hand down his neck to his torso. He used his both his arms to picked her up and seat her in his legs, holding her closer for one second, one second later Nina felt him using that arm and all his speed to seat her in the farther corner of the sofa; he retreated to the other side breathing heavily.

"Sorry I didn't mean-"

"Don't do that again. You've been thru enough and the last person who tried to help me and up in a hospital and I don't need you in my conscience too."

"Sorry, I…" he walked away before she finished.

Nina breathed in deep. Thinking was hard after practically flying across the room. She wasn't hurt other than her ego, maybe she would admit that her heart hurt a little too, maybe most of all. She felt guilt as if she was responsible for his pain and past, wished all that away. She decided if their horrible past can't just be made disappear, she'd find what she could infect do. She took her notebook and searched PTSD. She read every article she could until the sun was out.


	6. Missing Girl part II

*Warning*

*Warning*

*Warning*

This is a two parted story, so I must re-warn you guys. This chapter contains graphic descriptions of child abuse. It contains some heavy, heavy H/C so if this content is too heavy for you, just skep it. It will not be central to the story line and I'll be posting again next week.

…

When the morning came Nina left her research, she'd look thru academic articles, psychology magazines and anything related. She was tired; she needed coffee, fast. She remembered bitterly the hotel she stayed in Los Angeles; it was five minutes walking from a great coffee shop. Her house, in a condom in the middle of nowhere, was about ten minutes from anything and twenty minutes of the nearest coffee shop, even that had the worst coffee she'd ever tasted.

She looked the fridge; it was almost untouched, she wandered what James had to eat when she was away. Didn't matter now they were going to have a decent breakfast and she'd stop neglecting meals for her own sake.

She looked for a bag of brad she left in the back of the fridge it wasn't there. She'd prepared the waffle batter and fry bacon then; it would do for now. She took the bacon and the fresh waffles out and decided to snick down the hall and see if James was still asleep. His door was slightly open she looked inside to find a tided bed and an empty room didn't look like nobody had ever been there.

Predictable she didn't hear him leave; she didn't think she would even if she stood by the door all night. She slowly closed the door; she'd just go own with her life then 'he won't come back' she sat at the kitchen table deciding to ignore the food once more. 'Go back to your life Nina.' she told herself, she had work to do and her life would be easier without hiding a fugitive. Her trout didn't care though, it clenched anyway. her life would have been fine with him there; she had been thru worst, her work was easier with him there. He made her life better for been there she never had the chance to tell him.

The door unlooked before she dived too deep. "You're up already? I ate all your bread when you were away, so... what is it?" The wild look and fast heart pace didn't scape him, she looked like she was looking at a ghost; she tried to hid picking plates at the cabinet opposite to him.

"Did you sleep here at all last night?" she said splitting the food.

"Not really. I tried but I woke up and just need to walk."

"I went in your bedroom the bad was made didn't think anyone slept there." She set across the table. He seemed confused by the comment as if trying to retrace his own steps.

"I made it; thought I was supposed to. Don't people do that?"

"Yeah, they do it, actually, they do... Wait did you walked all night?" Nina said noticing the dark circles under his eyes.

"What are we doing today?" he said changing subject. "You think we could go see the kid's... Chace's house or his school?"

"Sure, we can stop by his house. I'll try to talk to him alone." It was better to just drop the late-night-walks conversation for now.

"Sure, we can wait for him outside, he has to leave the house some time and you can talk to the '_State basketball champion'_." He said in a high-pitched voice mimicking hers from the night before.

"Give me some bread and finish your breakfast. We can leave when we are done here." She said smiling and putting the slice of bread James give her in her plate. She was done with breakfast and back in her room in a minute; she picked fresh clothes before shower. James went after; she made him wear some of the clothes she picked for him in LA, nothing fancy, just same basics from a department store. New paints shirts and a new hoody; maybe he'd give hers back.

The drive to Chace's house was quiet. Nina tried to get him to talk but the tiredness from walking all night caught up to him as soon as he walked in the car. He woke up the night before in cold sweets feeling like he was strapped to the bad by metal restrains. He was cold like it used to be in captivity and he could hear voices at distance talking in a number of different languages he didn't understand. It took him sometime to understand he wasn't beck there. When he did, he was already walking off; he walked for a long time before he missed his motorcycle; it was too far to get now but he would go back for that sometime. When the sun was out, he found some money in his pocket and thought of Nina. The girl seemed to run on coffee alone, he didn't think he ever saw her eat before last night; maybe there was something he could do about that while he was around.

It was a Saturday 9:45 in the morning when they parked by the big house, it was in the nicer part of the town with a nice garden with pink flower to the front; for about two hours they didn't take the eyes of the house, when Nina stared dozing off he smacked her arm lightly and pointed at the house's front door.

"Son of a bitch." Nina said watching both Chace and Saskia, their missing girl, ride small bicycles out of the house like nothing was happening; Chace in a black bike and Saskia in a pink one just her size. "Let's wait for them to come back I want to talk to her."

…

The kids came back sometime later and Nina waited for them a couple of houses before Chace's; she stopped the kids before they got home.

"Hey! Hi, I'm sorry. Are you Chace Munford?" the two stopped and looked at the woman. "I'm here at the request of May and Chio Pang can I-"

"Saskia run!" The boy screamed and before Nina could finish. The little girl dropped her bike and ran the other direction, making as much distance from Nina her little legs could master but she got stopped by the arms of a man twice her size before making it to the end of the block.

Nina waited beside the boy while the girl kicked and screamed in Chinese against James body but he held her as gentle as possible. The tantrum turned into a soft cry when he said in Chinese "I'm not going to hurt you, we are not going to take you back if you don't want to, I promise".

"I don't want to go back, please, please don't make me go back there." the girl sobbed in Chinese. James crouched down to her size. The girl's little arms had old bruises and the girl looked sickly; probably as the result of been under feed, he aced. But the worst of all were the large bruise around her neck that looked about three days old. James looked away feeling disgust that quickly turned to anger, but all that died in sourness and heart break when the girl spoke again.

"They hurt me there, all the time, if you send me back they will do it again. I don't want to do it again, please." James's stomach dropped and he held his own tears hugging the little girl one more time before getting up caring the little one.

"You're not going back there, you'll be ok."

Chace's parents came out of the house to see the end of Saskia and James's conversation but Nina was fast enough to stop them before they got too close to James, so they wouldn't see his face.

"Mr. and Mrs. Munford, I'm Nina Fraser; I'm here on the request of her parents. Did you know she was reported as missing a few days ago?" Nina bluffed knowing her parents couldn't report the missing of the girl.

"Please, let's go inside." The woman said looking shaken by the little girl's state.

"Please, before someone suspects there're anything wrong here." The man said pointing to the house.

"Go on I'll take the girl and ask my friend to wait in the car." Nina said walking to James and motioning to take the girl from his arms; he wasn't sure he should. "Wait for me in the car, I'll just talk to them." He gave the girl the most broken look but complied. Nina really didn't want to leave him alone, but the little kid came first now.

The family house was big and nice; Chace and Saskia played a video game in the living room where Nina could watch them from the kitchen, with the parents.

"It's been like this for years now, Saskia and our Chace have been inseparables since she joined his school they are siblings for all they know," Mrs. Munford started. "and the way that family treated her... Last week she showed up here in the middle of the night with those things in her neck I couldn't let her go back"

"I know all that's awful but you can't just take a child, it doesn't work like that."

"Miss Fraser." The man protested. "Her parents, they... if we take that child to the police... if we do that, Saskia never sees her parents again. It would make it easier for us but... I hated my parents they were hideous too I still cried at their funeral when I knew I could never see them again, I won't do that to her." The girl closed her eyes and tried to find some air, she knew she could do one more thing.

"I may know someone that can help. He is a lawyer who worked similar cases with kids in my Dojo. I'll leave you guys his number." she said writing it in a block she found in the kitchen counter. "I'll come back in a few days to see how everything is going for her until we can evolve authorities. This girl is been thru enough don't make it worst" Nina said meaning it she come to them herself if something else went wrong to that little girl.

"We won't, we'll do everything we can for her."

"Good luck then." Nina said wishing the best for both the couple with the girl and herself with the soldier waiting in the car.


	7. Any Way She Could

He watched Nina walk back to the car. Hands in her pockets and her long black hair waving in the post rain wind that had been blowing strong in the last few days. She had a small concerned nod in her face that made him huff and slide down in his seat. She had Gavin, Mac and who knew what other people were in her life, plus and most recently him and this girl. How could she care for so many people at the same time? It seemed tiresome for him. And above it all she was sweet, even when she raised her voice to him a few days ago there was a fragility there, a tenderness. He felt himself be played by those as if he could only watch as she got what she wanted from him. She was no saint despite her sweet face.

"You good?" No would've been his only answer, he went with nothing stead. "The couple said that before Saskia ran away, they were already thinking of taking her in, if it ever came to it, they want to keep her now. I want to trust them but I'm still gonna pass by the house every now and again to see how things are going for her." She raised him an eye brown, His response was still nothing. If the little girl was ok, he had nothing left to say. He just wanted out of there as fast as possible.

…

Nina's spare bedroom was in the end of the house's hallway, the last room in it. It wasn't far enough from the kitchen that he couldn't hear just about every move the girl took in there. She was cooking now; he smelled of a variety of spices he couldn't name and meet in the fire. She dropped vegetables in the boiling water. It all filled up the room while he set in the edge of his bed. Just hoping it could drown the sound of the child's speech still playing in his mind. The oven open and closed, he closed his eyes, she hummed a song, it was a slow, dragged melody. The words mashing into one another like a monastery's chore. It did nothing to help calm his mind and soon enough he was far away from the room, far from that time. He remembered rain and solitude. He remembered longing, missing people he didn't know, not now at least. Then fear, the cold sprinkles of light rain in his face as he charged full speed in the enemy.

The year was 1943, it was his first in the front. He was in Italian territory; he remembered clearly a younger privet, a Scottish boy, he would always whistle such songs before they follow to battle. The kid didn't even realize he did it, James suspected. They were Celtic lullabies; his unit was almost all American, the boy explain it was the only reason he would sing such songs out laud. They were various but their melody unmistakable so was the anticipation they brought him. Another note and he was ready for war, the memory didn't stop at the quiet moments before the fight, he was back there, there were canons, gunfire. There were man falling, the pour willie, with his songs, his memories of home, fell too. Shot once to the head and he was gone. No warning, not then, not now. James was on his knees, shaking and sweeting. It was what he was most afraid of; it had to be her, it had to be this house, this life. He felt safe there, even if just a little it was enough. It was the clearest memory he had. His body felt weak, if this happened again in a fight, he would lose his mission.

…

A string of letters and numbers went up in Gavin's screen. He was asked to pay off the favor the European Rising Tide did him, with information about Colonel Anton Vasleiv. He just needed to do some decoding of S.H.I.E.L.D. files; he was almost done with that when he heard a loud boom from the fire escape, like a car had dropped there. He almost spilled coffee all over his keyboard getting up to check his window.

"James! What are you doing here?" he blurted out excited to see his old war hero. "I thought you and Nina were looking for that girl."

"We found her, this morning. I wanted to know about the bugs, did you get any other recordings?" He said looking again at the airplane models over the dresser.

While Nina was away in LA, Gavin brought James over to the old apartment he where he had been leaving with his mom ever since she got sick, little over a year ago. They spend an evening in the apartment spying on the hydra agents. Gavin attempt to hack into the real state building software, I didn't really work. Their documents were filed under layers and layers of encryptions. It could take months to crack it all; he decided to just drop it and ordered pizza. James got particularly interested in the models. A few of them were classic aircrafts. James vaguely remember flying one himself; he remembered been taught by a pilot reckless enough to let James pilot it, after just some quick instructions. He couldn't remember the man's name but he gave Steve his shield and was incredibly confident of his skills. he mentioned been the best civil pilot in the world.

"Bucky, you didn't tell me what you liked about those so much models" James turned around without meeting Gavin's eyes. "Sorry, I didn't mean to call you that, James, you have to tell me, you ever fly in one of those?" He smiled a little, he had developed a soft spot for the guy's ever-present excitement.

"Piloted actually, I might have learned years ago, I think."

"You're awesome, man. I've got one new recording from those same guys speaking in German again. The rest is just business stuff, they're really running a real estate firm for some reason."

"Best way to make something sound legit is if it really is, I guess." he said turning from the models.

"Does Nina know you're here? Bet she's cooking she does that when she's done looking for something or someone."

"I don't think so. We finished with the girl but there's still Hydra after me, I'm making things worse for myself staying here... And for her too. This is all a bed idea and I should leave."

"Ha! When is it not a bad idea?" Gavin said with a humorless laugh "It was a bed idea to help me, I was arrested twice before I turned eighteen, she still chose to be my friend anyway. When we met I was always getting in fights I couldn't win, got myself near dead a couple times, so Nina… she said that I should train with her, that if I could beat her I could beat anyone, that was over five years ago. I still can't beat her but I also don't want to fight anyone else. Between her and the Rising tide, I got purpose."

"That's not the same thing as people wanting to kill us."

"That's not a first either. Just ask her about Bruce, she convinced him to get out of this gang and his old boss, Jefferson, wasn't too happy about it. He sent guys to kill her. In the and not only she sent then running back to their mothers, she convinced Jefferson Bruce was more useful as a layer than some dumb gang member. What I'm trying to say is she's not a dumb girl and she's a good judge of character, If she is putting so much time and effort into keeping you around, I think she decided you are worth the risk. I say you should trust her."

"Send the audio over to Nina, I'll translate from there."

"Where you going?"

"I'm coming home."

…It was late at night when he made it back to Nina's place. He walked inside without a noise; he could see the counter from the entrance. There was an opened bottle and a glass of wine there, she was still at the kitchen that now smelled like dinner.

"You missed lunch, I decided to make a beef wellington for dinner thougth, it's my favorite food. My mom used to make it every year at my birthday." Nina shouted from the kitchen, she didn't need looking to know there was only one person that could walk in so quietly. "Can I ask where have you been?" She asked sincerely popping off from the kitchen.

"You were singing a sing earlier, it… it reminded me of when I was in Italy for the first time. Someone I knew there, he used to sing songs like that, Celtic songs. Then I remembered feeling… responsible, for him and for the other man there. I've been felling that way again lately; for that girl earlier, for your friend Gavin… for you."

"I notice, I can tell you care, even if you're trying not to because of, you know Hydra and everything. Just don't think we can't handle ourselves while you are here. We're careful, and I know it's taking long but I get it done, I can promise you that."

"Nina when it's done… I'll have to go."

The girl met his eyes. She tried to undo the puzzle that he was all at once as if that was her last chance, as if he was leaving tomorrow. He had large blue eyes, narrow, focused... soulfuls? His posture was rigid, built... uneasy, maybe he was waiting for a scolding, a punishment from outer space. He was a walking contradiction, for Nina, it kind of made him look like a miracle.

That punishment he was expecting never came. She just leaned forward, and kissed him, gentler this time, he kissed her back. He had meant it earlier, he sure wanted to do it again, no turning back this time. He wasn't going to lose it, he wasn't going to lose any time ether, he wouldn't have much of that. When she felt his hands go down the leggings she was wearing, she remembered they didn't cover her ass all the way she smiled before another soft kiss, their mouths fit perfectly together, her dinner would have to wait he wrapped his arms under her tights and took her away.

Her bed had soft blankets where he dropped her body that bounced a little on the mattress. He followed her tracing the skim in her chest, neck and face with his lips. Their lips met one more time as she slipped her hands under his shirt pulling it out of the way, revealing his metal arm and the scars around it. He stopped a second, face turned dark and gloom. Nina knew signs of abuse and she sow it; she took her own shirt off without a word. Light in the room was dim but he still saw the end of three long cuts around the left side of her ending a few inches of her belly bottom.

"I don't mind your scars if you don't mind mine." he ran his flash fingers over then.

"Your Dad?"

"Yeah, and yours, they are from Russia right."

"Some."

"They don't make how we are. we make who we are."

"Do you know that... Are you sure?" he really was asking, maybe she had a different answer then what his nightmares would tell him.

"I'm sure. Who do you want to be James?"

He gently pushed her body down until her head touched the pillows. Using both his hands took her paints out and opened his own.

"I just want to be inside you."

She nodded a soft yes with her head, James dived in her neck burying his lips and nose there. She shook a little as he inserted himself on her. She felt his body, it was a little hotter than usual, she could tell how careful he was not to hurt her. He moved soft and sweet; she would have him this way for now. She would have him anyway he wanted, anyway she could.


	8. Weed And Drug Dealers

When Nina was fourteen years old, she sneaked out of her father's place. She went to her neighbor's house, down the street. They were having a party for their son's birthday. When her father realized she wasn't home after he'd grounded her for some stupid reason, she couldn't remember, he called the house and the kid's parents conformed she was there; he ordered Nina to go back.

That walk was all she could think of now, not the beating she got for disobeying; the shell fear of something as simple as going home, plus the unfairness of it all. She thought of that day as she walked home that morning. After she saw her car burn on her way out of the grocery store, a man dragged her to the alley and pined her to a wall, her head hit the concrete hard making the girl grunt in pain. Nina wasted no time, pushing her body back with her legs, taking a turn. The man lost his grip on her; he gave a few steps back and pulled a knife out of his back pocket. He was fast and big, Nina had to use both her arms to stop his blow when he ran forward, raising his arm to stab her. She pinned his arm easily enough then hit his face with her elbow, then his chest her knee. She smiled when she heard him lose his air to her blow, she would have one second, all she needed for a final blow. She took a turn to use her body weight to do a rotating kick to his face that knocked the man out.

The man wasn't Hydra, as it had been her initial thought, those were a little harder to knock out, or at least they had been the last time she faced them, this one was wearing a very distinguishable bulldog tattoo. She knew that was the symbol of the only gang around that area, who also had a number of very personal reasons to be pissed at her. She reached to her forehead, she was bleeding and she could feel the skin beneath her eye heating up it would be black and bruised soon, damn it, Bucky would be so angry. He'd react nothing like her father but she couldn't stop the fear his memory involuntarily brought her.

...

James was seated in the kitchen table in the same position he was earlier that day when Nina left, looking thru some files Gavin left him. Records of arrests for treason and other crimes following the events of DC. The number of arrested top Hydra officials seemed never ending, but no record of the man he was looking for. He thought that maybe he got away and retuned to Russia, that would make it nearly impossible to find him. Nina walked in closing the door behind her and pressing her back against it for a minute to make the courage to explain him what happened.

"Nina? Do you want help with the groceries?" James heard her the moment she walked in and notice she was taking a little bit longer to come in.

"No, I'm fine... Coming! Just, don't freak out, Ok? I need to talk to you about something." he looked up to her when she got to the kitchen her forehead had a large red gap near her hair line and some dry blood in her hair and a bruise turning black underneath her right eye he got up fast enough to knock the chair he was seated in down, she tried to hide her face looking down when he stood but he put his hand in her chin and made her look at him.

"What happened? Who did this?" He said, really trying not to sound too harsh. She didn't have the time to respond the doorbell ringed and he step in front of her pulling a knife from his paints and Nina wrapped her hand in his metal arm.

"Nina, it's me! Open it! I'm alone I promise!" Gavin's voice from outside the door made them let out a breath niter one of them knew they were holding.

"It's ok I called him. We'll need his help." Nina said walking to open the door, James followed to the living room to the living room.

"Did you talk to Bruce, yet?" Gavin said as soon as she opened the door

"No, I only talked to you, I don't know why they would do this now, Gav."

"Did they really burn your car?" Gavin said already pulling his notebook out.

"They burned your car?!" James yelled, surprising Gavin who never noticed he was there. "Nina what's happening" he asked her already losing the battle to his anger.

"I'm not sure." Nina finally answered. "The guys who did this... I didn't think they actually came after me, they're from some street gang, they steal cars sometimes. The owners of two of those cars contacted me to find then, but I... I never even let anyone know it was me doing it." she said typing Bruce's number and putting him on speaker.

"Nina! I heard a bulldog set fire to your car and got a broken nose on his way out. Is that the only way I can talk to you anymore." Bruce said sounding snarky.

"What the hell was that Bruce? Bulldogs just set people's cars on fire for fun, now." Nina said starting to freak out. This lest few weeks were turning more agitated than her nervous system could handle.

"No, they only do it if you snitch on their money laundry place and they lose all their money! There was a police operation last night, the police took about a million dollars the bulldogs were about to move out of the country, along with some stolen jewelry. The word is; it was stolen jewelry you were looking for now there's a price on your head, sweetie… Nina you have to leave the town, girl... fast." Bruce said more serious than Nina had ever heard him "I would have called earlier but I just heard about all this now, I'm sorry girl."

"That's ok, Bruce. I'll figure it out." James watched Nina hang up the phone and take a deep breath.

"We'll fix it Nina." Gavin said but her eyes went glossy, she blinked a few times then looked at Gavin.

"Gavin, can you look into the money laundry operation for me? Maybe see if you can find how they heard I had anything to do with that, I'll try to do that too..." she looked at James and gave him a weak smile. "I'll need a place to hide until I know how to fix this. You think you can help me with that?"

"My old place. It was safe enough from hydra, sure is safe enough for you." James had good reasons to not want to back in the old Hydra safe house. While he was hiding there; the nightmares that house brought him, alone, he would never want to be there with someone else, but in his mind keeping her safe from wherever this was sounded as important as completing Hydra's missions to perfection used to.

"Thank you. I'll go pick some things we might need, then we can go?"

"Sure, I'll drive... Your car burned." he realized mind sentence. "Maybe I should get us another car the place I was in... It's far from here."

"You can take mine. I'll get a taxi or something, just be safe, the two of you."

"Thank you, Gav, you always come thru for me." Nina walked to her room leaving the two men alone waiting for her. The look Gavin gave the girl as she moved away caught James' eyes and he fell back somewhere with a crowd of people. He remembered looking for someone, at the same time he was sure of where to find him.

_"Are you really gonna do this again?"_

_"It's a fair, I'm going to try my luck."_

_"They will catch you, or worse they will really take you." He remembered fighting a little longer with the stubborn young man until someone called from a distance, he had to go and he knew that could be the last time he saw him "Just don't do anything stupid until I get back." He plead, more seriously then he let show._

_"How can I? You're taking all the stupid with you?" That little shit would never listen, he would never learn, but it down on him. This time he couldn't be there to take care of him like he'd always had and his heart shattered like glass._

_"You're a punk, you know that?" He went back and hugged his friend hoping it wouldn't be the last time, just like he did his father before he went months ago when he was drifted._

_"Jerk." And he did what was right, he walked away. "Don't win the war until I get there." the man said at last he turned midway to give a salute_. There it was the same look he saw on Gavin, he knew how it felt.

"I promise, I'll keep her safe. Don't worry." Gavin's head went down almost immediately.

"This is all my fault" he mumbled to himself, so quietly James wouldn't have gotten if it wasn't for his enhanced hearing, he put his keys on the counter and walked to the door "Can you tell Nina I'll see what I can find and I'll stop by Mac's to see how he's doing, I... I'm not going to tell him anything I'll just check on him, okay. And James thank you, for looking out for her, she's my sister you know." He said before closing the door behind him.

"I'll take care of her." James promised the empty room.


	9. Weed and Drug dealers part II

Sin wore her usual red jacket. It was a warm summer night yet she didn't feel like going out without something of her departed lover. She passed a long line of people outside the night club, entering in front of them all. Sinthea Schmidt was VIP no matter where she went. She ordered a cup dry martini but spilled some at the built gentleman next to her.

"I'm so sorry. Clumsiness is an unforgivable mistake. We always need to be making up for it." She said in her German accent, wiping the stain with a napkin.

"Forgiveness is a gift."

It was a code, arranged previously between her and her informer, the last Hydra Colonel. Anton Vasleiv, Sin's longest running mentor, dressed simply and still too formal for a night club. He was the holder of some of Hydra's biggest secrets; the winter soldier program, plus, the command of hydra's most important base in Russia. Sin knew the Colonel well, she earned his favoritism while in his guard during what were some of her harder years, surrounded by cold, loneliness and pain.

"If your father could see this, what has become of his life work, Hydra's great moment turned to ashes." He lamented taking another sip of his whiskey.

"Screw Hydra, screw my father. There was only one person I cared about and he is dead. He died because your men dropped a building on him."

The girl discretely put a gun on him. Even if she was no older than thirteen when brought to be trained by the best of his men, their time together didn't mean she wouldn't pull the trigger, Vasleiv trained her to be a killer. He was offended at first; in what world babysit a little girl was a good use of his time or resources? But orders were orders. The training began, quickly the skinny girl proved stronger and smarter than any of his men. When she turned fifteen his superiors decided it was time for a final test. They ordered for the winter soldier to be waken and brought for a confront. It was a long one, the asset himself couldn't understand how a been so little could be so much of a challenge for him. But even with her unnatural straight she wasn't a mech for his experience and skills, she finally taped out. Worse for her, they decided she needed more training and took her from Russia. That was the last Anton saw of the girl, but not the last he would hear from her or the terrorist group she leaded; The Serpent.

"Now, Colonel Vasliev, there were two people in that helicarrier and I'll deal with the Captain, but you are going to help me find that machine of yours."

"Screw Hydra?" He barked, dry and humorless before grabbing her hand and pulling the gun closer to his chest touching his shirt. "Screw hydra? Child, it was all going to be yours. Sinthea, you were created to replace your father, if you want to kill me? Do it, but I would have done anything for you. You'll forget all of this for one the crossbones."

"My father disowned me for been a woman, he was going to kill me, he froze me, Hydra failed me. Now tell me where can I find the Winter Soldier, so I can kill him."

...

James didn't lie about the distance. They had been driving for over one hour, out of the city and into the woods. Nina pulled her window down to enjoy the pure smell from the trees deep into the forest. she dived deep in thought James did hear a word from her. He wasn't about to say anything either. When he parked the car a sun flair blinded Nina while she tried to catch a look at his safe house. It was wooden mountain house, big enough to be turned into a hostel someday, with big wooden windows looking out from its two floors.

James didn't catch the sun light or the scent of fresh air, maybe he'd go to the trunk and get the bags or he could get the door for Nina but didn't do either. He just stayed seated, flash hand in the steering wheel trying to convince himself to get out of the car. He figured Nina didn't cared for his discomfort, she jumped happily out of the car without two thoughts of their luggage, she ran straight into the safe house. He tried to run and catch up to her before she stepped into something she wasn't supposed to, when he got there too late.

She'd passed by the well decorated living room into an equally well decorated hallway. Nina barely saw all that, she had a gut feeling, like the ones that helped her find lost people or solve mysteries, there were something in the end of that hallway. The furniture was high quality, the type that still look cool even several decades latter. The last door was semi opened. Inside no windows and a dirty floor, the only three tables there were covered in paper and schematics, one was turned to the ground. James ran in one second after her.

"They kept you in this room, the last time you were here?" He shook his head a no. "then... what was this place?"

"A safe house, I was only here one night, not long enough to be kept anywhere." there was a long pause. He stopped to really look at the room, rereading what happened there the last time. "I remembered I woke up in that chair, they erased me... Then nothing, I don't remember nothing, I... Someone died the last time I was here and I don't remember who."

"They forced you to do it." he would still not look at her but she could see how dark his eyes went. "We shouldn't be here, let's go back home."

That got his attention. he looked her down in a whip, cupping her soft face in his flash hand.

"No, no. I promised I'd keep you safe, I'll do it, ok" Nina smiled softly.

"I don't want you to..." She stopped midsentence sure where she was going with that, 'hurt'? What in this world could hurt a super hero? Did she had the courage to say it?

"I'm not, I'll be ok. I want to help you. You said it, helping other people... that helps." He already had his metal arm wrapped around her waist.

"Just promise me you'll keep away from this room."

"I promise."

She smiled a little more thru two soft kisses. "let's get out of here." he said to her ear lifting her body up, legs wrapped around his waist. He carried her to the living room. If he was feeling better, he liked to go a little harder. That was the case today, Nina liked it like that. If she forgot all the mass of the world, his body pushing over hers felt like a gift, she let go of herself, let go of her past and present worries. James dropped his head to her neck like he usually did, her smell, her smoothness. He hoped if he did it enough times it would start feeling like home, and maybe that could convince him it was safe there. Enough bad memories for him, enough bad in general.

…

_Sacramento palace hotel, CL _

Bruce walked into the luxurious hotel with less than a few crossed looks from the staff. Earlier that day he promised Nina he would look into the bulldogs, but that night he would meet with Sin in the hotel room she booked for herself.

"Gin! Girl you got taste!" he shouted checking a half drunken bottle in her table.

"Thanks, let me poor you one." Sin answered from the balcony outside the room. She was wearing her usual red jacket, this time over a black tube dress that hugged her curves and stopped long before her knees some high heels. She was beautiful, not enough that he didn't see the small 38' she was carrying.

"Try, this one is my favorite."

"You don't need this here, we among friends."

"This, no" she said motioning with the gun. "I don't need it. Here take it." She offered him the gun.

"I don'-"

"TAKE IT!" he did it. Sin walked away, stopping out the balcony again, far enough from him. "Now take a look at those pictures." Bruce did it. They were pictures of Nina and James, earlier that morning. They were loading a car and taking of together.

"Nina she... I thought that if she believed she was in danger she would-"

"What. did I. Tell you?" Bruce's blood went cold, she was getting impatience.

"You told me you wanted him alone."

"I'll kill you Bruce, you failed I have no choice. Unless you can kill me first." Bruce didn't wait, he pulled up the gun and unlocked it. Sin was much faster than he knew thought. She ran across the room, before he could make the shot, she ripped the gun off his hand and grabbed him by the neck. Holding the man a few inches from the ground. "I guess you would die. I won't kill you, today."

Sin dropped him to the ground, where Bruce fell whistling for air. She just ignored him trying to get up, poured herself another drink and walked to one of the sits near the table.

"The winter soldier is dangerous enough on his own. The girl with him put our agent in the E.R. a few weeks ago. I need him alone_because_I'll deal with him alone. Then I'll kill her for you if you want that. But before all you need to do is get her out of my way for a day or so."

"I can kill Nina myself. I'll get her out of your way. Tomorrow, first thing in the morning, I'll..."

"Here's the thing, I don't trust you can pull up your zipper without your dick stuck in it, so you are going to do what I tell you to do, when I tell you to do it."

He heard her instructions one by one, then left her alone to finish her bottle by herself.

…

There was noise from the outside, Nina rolled in the couch but the worm body she slept on was no longer there. The big room was dark and she had to look around for her clothes by touch, she found her pants but her shirt had flown away, she just slipped into James', too cold to run around in her undies.

She walked outside as quietly as she could, but the cricket wooden from the old front porch may have given her away. James didn't mention it though. He was outside wearing just his pants and knife quiver, standing in front of an old tree trunk, she set on the porch and watched him throw the knife at a spot on the trunk, walk pick the knife then came back and star again. He did this a few times before looking over to her "Come try this."

Nina got up and walked curiously to his side. "I don't know how to do that."

"I'll show you" he said neutral. "Stand here." He said positioning her where he was standing; he put the knife in her hand and arched her arm beck with one hand and holding her body straight with the other. "Do you see marking in the center? try to hit there."

She threw it with all her strength and got about an inch distance from where he had pointed but it was the handle of the knife that hit the trunk and it fell to the ground.

"I want to try again." She said feeling challenged, caught the knife and tried a couple more times and got it stuck there by the fifth try.

She wanted to jump at him to celebrate but he just walked back to the trunk. "That was good, go again." he said dryly on the way. She followed stopping his hand before he got the knife out.

"You OK?" He pushed his lips together. "It's this place, isn't it? You're having nightmares about what happened here, aren't you?"

He pulled the knife out walking back without giving her an answer, he didn't have to, it was true. She knew he had nightmares, she heard him before in her house even when they slept together a few nights ago, she could hear him whimper and cry for help.

"I told you we shouldn't have stayed here." He didn't listen nor answered, just threw the knife one more time this time at arms distance of her head. She didn't flinch just reaped it from the trunk before him.

"James I'm sorry... this is all my fault..." She whispered. "But if you want to spent the night doing this, I'll stay here with you, it's my turn anyway." They just walked quietly back and she threw it one more time. They took turns with it all night.


End file.
